From when I was very young, I was told my life was meant to be a certain way because I was born with Cystic Fibrosis. I was meant to die young to start with. And then I wasn’t meant to make it to my teens. Then adulthood…… you get the drift. There were other things that people assumed I would not get to experience because I was “sick”. I remember a close friend in primary school telling me she felt sorry for me because I would never have a boyfriend because I was sick. I remember thinking “Really?”. I didn’t even think that would be a problem but she obviously had. I was told that I would be never be able to cope with working, that I should just be grateful that we have a Disability Pension in Australia. I remember thinking “Just watch me!” to that one! The list could go on and on. It would have been so easy for me to listen to all those “experts”, to resign myself to having a half life. Limitation was not a primary thought pattern. I was not going to sit there and wish for a life. I was going to go out and have one. And I have! Really I have!
I went out and got a part-time, after school job as soon as I turned fifteen. I got the job a month before my birthday and had to wait four long weeks to take it up! Not too much later I had my first steady boyfriend, we stayed together for four years. I was single for a little bit and then meet my current boyfriend who has been a huge source of happiness. I do not feel like having an illness ever stopped me from having a relationship because I have more to offer than just a being a “sick person”! When I finished school I never had trouble finding jobs. I eventually completed a traineeship and even got nominated for the Trainee of the Year. I even made the finals. There are so many more things that people told me were not an option and I am so glad that I didn’t listen to them. Yes, it is important to know your limits, what you are physically capable of, but if you feel like you are strong enough to do something then you should go for it.
When you live with Chronic Illness and Injury the way you think really does effect your body. By limiting your thoughts to only sickness you are only ever going to experience sickness. So what do you do if that is where you are? The sick thoughts have taken over the healthy, happy thoughts. Well, the first thing you need to do is increase your awareness. You cannot change what you don’t acknowledge so it is important to say to yourself….
“Hey, I am finding myself thinking about sickness and limitation all the time. This is not making me happy at all.”
By acknowledging your limiting thoughts you are then more able to catch yourself when you are on the “sickness” track again. I know it is hard, I too had to start from the bottom. When I became really sick my illness was my identity, it consumed my thoughts. When I realised that I didn’t want to live like that anymore I set about changing the way I thought. Every time I got into a “sickness” thought pattern I would mentally stop and shake myself. I would acknowledge that what I was thinking may be true but it was not making me feel good. I would then try and do something to create a positive train of thought. It may have been as simple as making a cup of tea, reading a chapter in a positive book, reading your favourite quote a couple of times. Start small. If you just pull yourself up once today, then twice tomorrow, the three times that day after…. each day you are gradually bringing more positives to your way of thinking. It will not take long to get yourself thinking thoughts that have a positive effect on you physically and mentally. And when that happens you will be more open to opportunities for achieving something someone (even you) may said you couldn’t do!
I would not have gotten anywhere if I didn’t question those around me and most importantly myself. You always need to check whether you are shutting yourself off to something amazing because you – or someone else – has told you that it is beyond our limits. Whenever you think about something you would love to do but shouldn’t or even cannot remember YOU LIMIT YOUR THOUGHTS – YOU LIMIT YOURSELF.
All the best, Lily
For more information on this blog or myself please see the ABOUT page, or the great posts on the ARTICLES page
